Scott Fried . Teens Speak Out

Ages 16-20

Joanie

Age	17
Who Are You?	I am a 17 year old and I have a 7 month old baby. I’m in the 11th grade. I’m in Juvenile Detention.
Whose arms do you fall into?	My son’s.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	I’m waiting for me to leave Juvi so I can raise my baby better.
What is your weapon?	My attitude and quick temper.
Whom do you miss the most?	My grandmother.
What are you scared of?	Life.
What is your favorite memory?	Having my baby.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	I don’t remember. But I know that GOD is telling me that everything is going to be alright.
What words are you holding onto in your pockets?	Courage peace love joy hope brave keep going never give up.
What's the best advice you've ever been given?	Don't give up. I am not a nerd.
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	I would tell my mother to stop trying to make me do things that I don’t want to do. And I would also tell her that I’m not a baby anymore and that she needs to accept the fact that I have a child now.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	Yes. lost.
Are you enough?	Yes.

Greg

Age	17
Who Are You?	One of the many.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I fall into the arms of the people who once fell into mine.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	I am waiting to learn who I am and what I want. I don't know in what direction to use my initiative. You can say that I'm waiting to stop waiting.
What is your weapon?	Self-confidence. There is a comfort far greater than the compliments that others can give you, and that is what you can tell yourself. All I need is one reminder that I am enough, and I feel safe thereafter.
Whom do you miss the most?	I miss my childhood self - before my parents' divorce, before my heart was broken twice, before I took the path with all the mistakes.
What are you scared of?	I'm scared of not having enough friends. I jump into a strange group and befriend them all, I meet everyone in every class that I'm in. I gain allegiance and acquaintances. Although I'm always shy of friendship. Some see me as popular, gregarious, but only I see myself as a facade. I'm scared of being true to myself, honest to others, loving.
What is your favorite memory?	My favorite memory is when I went to summer camp in Canada. When I met my best friends and learned that I am allowed to feel - that I don't have to be lonely.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	I don't know if it was God who I was speaking to or if I was just in contact with my unconscious, but I decided that I will live how I want to live.
What words are you holding onto in your pockets?	I don't want to be gay.
What's the best advice you've ever been given?	"Breathe."
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	Please be more real with me. I can't stand it when you pretend to be happy. And when you take that advice and start yelling like you always do, compromise. And when you decide that you can't compromise, beat the impossible. Concede. For your own sanity and for the sake of your love, please step away from being selfish. Be like a couple.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	It feels like it will swallow me whole. Like nothing anyone can do will save me. Despair. I feel lost. I stumble. I don't smile. I wish it to end. I hit my head against my wall. I cry. I forget the great life that I believed before and will believe after my trauma that I have and will have.
Are you enough?	I am enough. No matter how much you hate me and no matter how much I hate me. No matter how much you love me or no matter how much I feel like I'm dying or going insane. Never will I be more, never will I be less. It's a funny question- rating someone qualitatively. My response is that this is a trick question. Everyone is enough. When I'm sad, lonely or feeling suicidal, I stop feeling that way by telling myself, "I am enough." You don't need friends to tell you that. These are words that anyone can say. But when people talk about the power behind words, that is when you can use this phrase as your weapon and tell it to yourself, every morning, afternoon, night, as long as you live - for as long as you need to know.

Maya

Age	17
Who Are You?	I am forever growing, and even though right now, I do know who I am, I know that I will change. I am an artist; I am a good listener, I am a wallflower. I love to watch what is going on; I love to understand the underlying thoughts, meanings.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I fell into Anthony J's. But he was/is bipolar, and we didn’t know, so he broke my heart. We have tried to talk, but it doesn’t work after time. He tried to block me out of his life, but when I really needed him, he was the only one that got it, that understood, and that knew how to calm me down.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	Well, to find another one, but I’m too lazy and I have too many trust issues to start over. What I am really waiting for is for him to come back.. It’s lame I know, it’s so cliche, but that’s really it.
What is your weapon?	Understanding things, figuring out things before others do, even about themselves, before they want to admit it. It sucks because sometimes I get annoyed that they can’t realize these things, and I tell them. Ha
Whom do you miss the most?	Well, Anthony.
What are you scared of?	Having the same situation happen, without any warning; having someone abandon you.
What is your favorite memory?	Going to Idyllwild, CA Arts, a wonderful camp where I can be fully open most of the time. People there just seem to be accepting and wonderful.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	I have no idea. I wouldn’t know what to say back
What words are you holding onto in your pockets?	bisexual, acceptance, know, wish, hate, rumors, appearance, different, enough, pot, love, hurt, change, help, and don’t take this too seriously but molested. Please don’t judge. I know you wont, but still. Thank you.
What is going to be your mark on this life?	I do not care about changing the masses. When I was younger I wanted to be an actress and help the world to be inspired, but as I grow, I want to understand how others perceive the world. When I was younger I thought that I saw everything different from them, and wondered why I can’t be the same, why is it so easy for them to put on that mask? I know that even if I only affect the people around me, they will be changed and affect the people around them, making a huge difference.
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	I understand that it is difficult, but stop trying to control everything. Yes boundaries are important, but next year I’m gone - no boundaries. I need more freedom.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	Yes of course, as there is in everyone, and it hurts. When there is a part missing, and you can still feel it for a millisecond, and feel like its still there, and then remember that its gone, it hurts. And I hate him for hurting me so badly, and worsening this trust issue that I have. That I have to understand someone and they can’t understand me.
Are you enough?	Even though I know it wasn’t my fault that things turned out the way they did, I still feel like it is, and no I’m not, because I’m not big enough to get over it. I cant let it go, and it really bothers me that after over a year, I still think about him every day.

singingforever

Age	16
Who Are You?	I am me. I am a student. I am hard-working and sit through school all day long. But I really am creative and want nothing more than to express myself onstage or with my violin. I love music, but I can't sing. I love the theater. I am human. I am religious, more than most kids. I behave like others. I don't behave like others. I try to be better behaved, but I have so much trouble. I'm not perfect. I am lazy sometimes. I am depressed. I am so anxious. I love. I am enthusiastic in what I believe in and care about. I am caring. I am obsessive. I am energized. I am friendly. I am not very athletic, and don't know much about sports, but I love the Yankees. I am gifted with sight into others. I dream.
Whose arms do you fall into?	Natasha...she understands me more than anyone else ever has, despite our many differences.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	I am waiting to achieve the perfect societal behaviors.
What is your weapon?	My weapon is my belief that I am unique, and I am special.
Whom do you miss the most?	I miss my younger self, the girl who didn't worry or feel depressed or pressured.
What are you scared of?	Death, and the lack of someone who really loves me. And I don't mean my family or my friends.
What is your favorite memory?	Looking out from Mount Washington onto the Taconic Valley...it was the most beautiful, serene scene I have ever seen
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	I can't remember...which is so sad because I am religious. I believe in God.
What words are you holding onto in your pockets?	Picking at myself. Regretful.
What is going to be your mark on this life?	My mark will be living as full as I can, and teaching my children (one day!) to love and dream and to never let anything stop them.
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	Listen to me. Sometimes, I'm right. Take my cues as messages to you. Love me no matter what, and always assure me you do and mean it!
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	Yes. It actually feels so much like it shouldn't be there that it feels like a bowling ball in my stomach...it can hurt.
Are you enough?	Not totally...if only I behaved as I should, I would be enough.

mensch

Age	18
Who Are You?	I hope I am a good person. A real mensch
Whose arms do you fall into?	There are people who are there, but don't always care. I feel that no one is REALLY there.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	For my anxiety to lighten up so I can live and stop having the urge to cut myself
What is your weapon?	Judaism
Whom do you miss the most?	Someone who will be there for me 24 hours a day, 8 days a week.
What are you scared of?	Change
What is your favorite memory?	coming home on Friday afternoon and playing on my swing set
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	I never spoke to G-d, but I had a feeling that He was guiding me to become more religious
What words are you holding onto in your pockets?	I am not who I look like. I have problems, anxieties and fears that I am so good at hiding. People think I am perfect and don't have any idea what is really inside of me.
What is going to be your mark on this life?	Being there for everyone of my friends so I can make a difference. I want to touch lives and make people happy.
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	Let me choose my own ways, because I promise I won't mess up. Give me my space while I'm at college.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	Yes. A feeling of worthlessness, and that I don't deserve to be here on earth.
Are you enough?	From what Scott told me, I am enough. I feel that I could be more– I could be nicer, stronger, better, smarter.

enough

Age	18
Who Are You?	I don’t know. I am a girl who in the second grade was forced to grow up. that’s 9/11 happened. Also, that year my mother had a brain tumor and needed 7 surgeries for it, at the same time my grandfather fell and broke his hip. i was forced to grow up and take care of my younger brother. i finally felt like i was able to be myself this year when i found something out. Iin January this year my parents told me they were getting divorced and it followed by “daddy is gay!” i was relieved to think that that was why and not cause they were fighting... but i don’t know who i am and what i am doing here!
Whose arms do you fall into?	i used to think i fell into this one guy’s arms... i used to trust him and now i feel alone, i feel like i don’t have anyone!
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	aside from world peace, i am waiting for someone to accept me for me and love me that way
What is your weapon?	running
Whom do you miss the most?	my dead uncle, my happy family, and most of all the guy i used to be able to fall into
What are you scared of?	never being loved for me and who i am. i am scared of people close to me dying. i am scared for my father
What is your favorite memory?	the shabbat before my parents told me they were getting divorced.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	he never has, but if he did i am assuming it says something like "life sux get over it"
What words are you holding onto in your pockets?	I AM SCARED!
What is going to be your mark on this life?	i want to make everyone see that they can make a difference
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	life is just as hard as it was when you were younger, if not harder!
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	all the time! it feels like a hole, literally and emotionally. i feel like there is nothing i can do to save it
Are you enough?	no. i am never enough until i have someone who really does accept me for me

Sandy

Age	19
Who Are You?	In the past, I could not answer this question. Now I can. I'm 19 years old, a singer, writer, intelligent, bright, caring and loving. I'm also a person who wants to one day change the world with my words
Whose arms do you fall into?	My parents or my girlfriend. Those people make me feel like I'm the best person in the world.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	The miracle has come. The day when I found a place where I belonged and where everything made me feel good.
What is your weapon?	Writing and Music
Whom do you miss the most?	My grandparents because they can't see the person I grew into.
What are you scared of?	Losing my parents and friends and losing the happiness and confidence that I have not felt since I was 9.
What is your favorite memory?	When Scott came to my High School in 2005. He made me feel like everything would be okay and that I was not alone. He was right. Thank you.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	When I went to listen to Scott speak. He made it clear to me that I was more than enough.
What words are you holding onto in your pockets?	How can I stand here with you and not be moved by you.
What is going to be your mark on this life?	T change the world and make a difference.
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	Be supportive and never forget that you were once a teenager too, and that all I need is you to help me along the way.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	Yeah, there is. It feels like a knife cutting me up. It's when I feel like I'm not enough; it's when I reach for my Ipod to escape and for awhile finally feel like everything will be okay.
Are you enough?	Yeah I am. I know it now because I've become the amazing person I always knew I could be. I don't let anyone push me down and I keep working to better myself.

Addie

Age	17
Who Are You?	I don’t know how to answer this originally. In the end, I guess that’s a big part of who I am - a person who wants to be unique and original and I often feel I am. I'm a singer, an over-thinker, and an overall content person. I am still developing a sense of who I am and I’m pretty sure I will never be able to truly define it.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I fall into my mom's arms, or my best friend’s, or my own arms.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	To feel comfortable being 100% me around people and to not care how others view me.
What is your weapon?	Silence.
Who do you miss the most?	The dad I knew when I was younger. As a teenager, and also just as I've grown up, I've seen more of him and he's changed in my eyes. He and my parents are divorced and my dad sees my mom in me. We don't get along and I miss the father I once knew.
What are you scared of?	Living life not being open about myself and who I am.
What is your favorite memory?	Amazing nights at camp.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	I don’t believe in God...but I wish I did.
What is going to be your mark on this life?	The help I give to people (I want to be a psychologist).
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	Forget about who you want me to be and open your eyes to who I am. Love me as much as you say and think you do, even when I turn out different than you expected.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	Yes. It is due to the fact that I am not completely open about who I am and how I want to live. It feels like I cannot ever fully break my silence. It’s a struggle but it’s the only thing I know for now to make me feel safe.
Are you enough?	I am enough. I just want other people to think that too.

Jodan

Age	18
Who Are You?	I am me. I am ordinary. I am extraordinary. I eat. I sleep. I cry. I bleed. I smile. I mourn. I pray. I live. I am the daughter of a cancer survivor. I am the friend of a cutter. I question who I am and who I will become. I love myself for who I am.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I fall into the arms of my mom, the arms of years of pain and grief, the arms that held me as a child and are still strong enough to hold me now.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	I am waiting to find that special someone. That one person who I can cry in front of, laugh with until my stomach aches, say anything to. The person who's arms I can fall into knowing that they will catch me and not let go.
What is your weapon?	My words are my weapons. With a mere grunt or a phrase I can say everything that needs to be said.
Who do you miss the most?	I miss my Aunt Joyce. Her cancer came from out of the blue, as do all I guess, but she left me faster than I was ready to let go.
What are you scared of?	I am scared that I will come and go leaving only footprints in the sand.
What is your favorite memory?	The six weeks I spent at Penn State University were the six best weeks of my life. This was the time when I found myself and fell out of the cocoon of fear I had wrapped myself into.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	I do believe in G-d, but I am not ashamed to say He has never spoken to me, at least not that I know of.
What is going to be your mark on this life?	My mark on this life will be the love I leave behind. I love with all my heart and all the strength in my body.
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	My parents don't need advice. I am blessed with a mom and a dad that love me unconditionally and have raised me to be a self-assured and caring person.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	Sometimes, when I am sad I feel alone and empty, but luckily, only for a short while. My stomach gets heavy, my lungs feel tight, and I want to cry but the tears won't come. I suddenly feel unsafe, like a trip could kill me. Thankfully, I have friends that make sure I never feel this way.
Are you enough?	I am enough. I love and am loved. I think and I try.

Thaddeus

Age	18
Who Are You?	I am who I am
Whose arms do you fall into?	Erin's... she is always there with me all the way. Even when she might not know what the real problem is. But she is the one person that understands me the most without me telling her a thing.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	There isn't really one that I am waiting for. A miracle happens when it happens. Meanwhile I just believe in myself and never give up hope.
What is your weapon?	My willpower. I use it to protect something or someone that is precious to me. No matter what, if something is important to me, I protect it with all my might.
Who do you miss the most?	I would say Erin. Sometimes she is gone and when she is I always miss her and there is never a day that I don't think about her. But when she is back things are good again.
What are you scared of?	Loneliness. I found out that it is very dangerous for me. Feeling lost and alone. It causes me to do and see things differently in a negative way.
What is your favorite memory?	There are many good memories. I don't really have a favorite one. If I had to pick one, it would be this time where I was with my best friend and we were in trouble but we worked together and got out of it. It is good to know you have a real best friend and not the kind that is fake.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	It was a few weeks ago in my dreams. He said "I know you are a monster but you are a good monster...”
What is going to be your mark on this life?	My mark is going to be happiness. I think that is the most important thing. Instead of making history or becoming famous. I think all that is useless if you are not happy.
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	I would say please whatever you do, don't yell. Talk it out. And if you are really going to yell, keep it short, ‘cause remember when my mom yells, she will still be yelling when I am trying to sleep.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	I don't think there is any. Even if there is, I am sure that it will be filled sooner or later.
Are you enough?	Yes I am. I know that I can survive, even though I prefer to be with someone I love and who loves me back.

Cedi

Age	17
Who Are You?	I don’t really know
Whose arms do you fall into?	When it’s not serious, my dad's. When it is, I hold it in
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	To get famous
What is your weapon?	Food
Who do you miss the most?	The old me
What are you scared of?	One of my parents dying....and falling in love and getting rejected
What is your favorite memory?	There's a lot of favorite memories that I have. I guess all the ones where I felt special
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	When Scott Fried came to my school...and he told me that I’m not alone
What is going to be your mark on this life?	I think I want to be a motivational speaker and one day inspire teenagers like me
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	When you listen to me....believe me!
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	I think the emptiness I feel is where my self-esteem and confidence should be
Are you enough?	I don’t think so. I say this because I don’t have enough self esteem...and I don’t feel attractive

lost

Age	17
Who Are You?	I’m a nice, caring, loving, independent, asshole who’s lost in the game called “life”
Whose arms do you fall into?	My own. No one else’s
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	To fall in love and live so far away from my "family" who hates me and just live life happy for once
What is your weapon?	Music, my imagination and my bag of pot.
What are you scared of?	I'm scared of dying alone, knowing that I lived a boring life, of becoming insane and having a meltdown, being embarrassed by my family, becoming a drug addict
What is your favorite memory?	Childhood. Simple. No worries. Just simple.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	IDK, but I know that He’s there for me. But sometimes I feel like He’s punishing me for what I have done.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	Yeah. It feels like I've lost hope in everything - in life school, family, friends...everything

bobette

Age	17
Who Are You?	My true self is hidden behind my struggles. I have been a bulimic for the past four years and it’s a hard habit to break. I am surrounded by great friends and family, yet I constantly feel alone. Although I receive good grades, I don’t feel like my intelligence shines in school. I’m loud, funny and obnoxious. I'm truly one of a kind.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I try to fall into the arms of my closest friends and family. Unfortunately, I usually don’t find comfort in anyone or anything.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	An end to ignorance. If people started educating themselves, maybe the world wouldn’t be such a crappy place.
What is your weapon?	Food, anger and weed. Those are my three weapons of choice.
Who do you miss the most?	I miss my best friend. She moved to Florida a few years ago and we still keep in touch, but my life doesn’t feel the same without her
What are you scared of?	I'm scared of failure. I’m scared that I won’t break any of my habits. I fear that I will never be happy. I'm scared of being alone.
What is your favorite memory?	My childhood. I loved not having responsibility. I liked having the freedom to do what I wanted, when I wanted. I liked having both of my parents together. When my parents got divorced at age six, I felt alone and responsible for all my actions. I truly have never felt the same.
Are you enough?	I'm not enough, yet. There are a lot of goals I need to achieve before I allow myself some credit. I want my self-esteem back. I want to be happy again. I want to stop binge-eating! There is only so much therapy you can do. Ultimately, regardless of how much you vent, you need to just accept your flaws. I haven’t accepted mine yet. I haven’t accepted the fact that I suck at memorizing, or that I’m not stick thin, or that I’m not good at math. I won’t be enough until I can accept my flaws, but that feels impossible.

Perfect Chaos

Age	16
Who Are You?	I am not my new jeans or my sunglasses or my new clothing. I am not in love with materialism like every carbon copy in my high school. I am the one that they forgot to tweak, the one who thinks a little differently, the one who could fit perfectly into conformism but chooses not to. I am living a life of perfect chaos. Sometimes I do all the right things and they don't feel right, and sometimes I do the wrong things and they feel so right. I am passionate and I'm not afraid to laugh until I cry. I'm not afraid to cry until I laugh. No matter how "weird" or "unconventional” or "odd" you believe I am, I won't change myself for you.
Whose arms do you fall into?	When I feel like I'm not enough, I want to make out with some boy. Just to feel loved, to feel liked, to feel beautiful, to feel literally close with someone. While I realize this isn't the "right" answer, I am answering in all honesty. But if I had to pick my second-best support system it would be my brother, who is always there to talk about everything, and respects and understands me as a growing person. When I talk to him there are no worries of acceptance or understanding, because even if he doesn't understand he always knows how to make it better.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	To not be waiting for anything. To learn what life is like when you can truly live for the moment instead of hoping and waiting for the next good thing to come along. I am waiting for today, for now, for every moment that I shouldn't let pass me by.
What is your weapon?	Dancing. Letting my body surrender to my soul, faking the happiness, I wish that I felt, or aggressively throwing out my anger by throwing around my body. Dance is there for me when no one else is, and it makes me forget about everyone that needs to be forgotten.
Who do you miss the most?	Someone who surrendered themselves to an addiction of a substance that has hurt almost everyone I know: drugs. He was one of my strongest support systems. He was the best person to talk to when I didn't understand. He always understood, and now he's in prison for 13 years and no matter how hard I try to say that it could've been worse, the tears don't always stop when I'm lying in the dark and there's no one to stop me.
What are you scared of?	Being completely open with the world, letting myself go, only to be completely misunderstood. I'm afraid of dying without ever experiencing love. I'm afraid of artificial beauty and artificial thoughts enveloping. I'm afraid of not being me.
Are you enough?	Maybe I'm not enough to be with this boy or to be as popular as that girl. But I AM enough for me, for me to be living a life of happiness, to be happy where I am and not wait or wish to be something else, or somewhere else. I am enough because I've learned to accept myself.

TiniJet46

Age	20
Who Are You?	I'm a sophomore at Ohio University and I heard Scott speak tonight. I'm a magazine journalism major in one of the top 10 journalism schools in the country, hold a position in my sorority, have a great boyfriend and a ton of different groups of friends. But tonight I wasn't even supposed to go to see Scott. My roommate was too sick to go and asked me to go in her place. But I'm glad I did. His stories, the way he spoke...was amazing.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I fall into the arms of my boyfriend. Yeah Scott, I know, I don't need a guy to be "enough" but he really is a huge part of my life and for a while, I thought he "completed" me. But now I realize, if I needed to, I could fall into my own arms because I am enough. Sam really is my best friend though, and knows everything about me.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	I'm waiting for the day I graduate college, waiting for my wedding day, waiting for my first child to be born....because all of those experiences are miracles to me. But really, I just am waiting for the day when I'm loved for who I am and for me to be in love with that man so deeply that I'm happy to receive the "glancing touch.”
What is your weapon?	My weapon is having been raped. I think I'm a stronger person because that happened to me, though I didn't realize what had happened to me was rape until I was a freshman in college and took a sexual assault education class. I hold it over people's heads, like I'm better because I'm broken. Maybe it makes me more interesting to other people.
Who do you miss the most?	I miss my friend Chase. He was the all-American guy, three years older than me. The guy I had a crush on at the country club and who coached me in swim team for four years. We reconnected last memorial day weekend at the pool. He was about to graduate from OU and we had a beer together and talked about how we had not hung out at school even though we were on the same campus. He told me to Facebook him since he would only be at school for another couple weeks. I didn't. I forgot. On September 2, he was drunk driving his friend home and they were racing his BMW. He crashed into a garage, hit a fuel line and the car caught fire. His friend was left without a scratch, but Chase died. I'll never get over the fact that we didn't hang out and that I didn't call.
What are you scared of?	I'm scared of ever confronting the man who raped me. I hate him. I HATE what he did to me. He took my virginity away and I’m scarred because of him. He still texts me, expecting we're friends. He doesn't know what he did to me because he was drunk. I never told him. I'm scared. But I'm also sacred. That's why the only guy who has had sex with me is someone I'm in love with.
Are you enough?	I am enough. I'm broken, but I'm still sacred. I’ve been through a lot, but that doesn't make me worthless. I'm enough to a lot of people, especially myself, so those who think I'm not can leave me alone.

Tuesday

Age	17
Who Are You?	I am a lost individual who both envies and admires the way you are so sure of yourself and love yourself.
Whose arms do you fall into?	There aren't arms I fall into - just an empty abyss. I don't trust people enough to let them get close to me.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	I am waiting for the day I can accept myself for my faults and my strengths. I am waiting for the day I can love myself no matter what others say and what the world screams in my ears.
What is your weapon?	I am empathetic and I care. For every person that comes into my life, I promise to care. I promise to worry when no one does. I promise to be there when the world has turned its back on them. I promise to catch them when they feel they have fallen. I care too much.
Who do you miss the most?	I miss the simple moments in life. I miss being sure. The color blue in the box of crayons. Parents who are super-heroes. I miss watching the sky change colors as time passes by. I miss having the time to do that.
What are you scared of?	I'm scared of falling and having no arms to fall into. I haven't yet needed those arms but what if that day does come and I just fall?
Are you enough?	I don't think I am enough. I have too many faults that are capable, I think, to hurt others and myself.

Danielle

Age	17
Who Are You?	I am everything I shouldn't be. I am the liar. I am the thief. I am the rumor starter. I am the bulimic. I am the fat girl. I am the antisocial. I am the opposite of the American Dream.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I fall into my boyfriend’s arms, when he's there to catch me. I am needy. I use people as my safety net when I mess up and can't fix things myself.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	I am waiting for the day that things are perfect. The day when I am perfect.
What is your weapon?	The tough persona that I put on that makes people think I am happy and confident. My weapon is also food. But that is a double-edged sword because whereas in the moment it may help, the after effects only makes me feel worse.
Who do you miss the most?	I honestly don't miss anyone. People are easily replaceable to me so I don’t allow myself to miss them.
What are you scared of?	I am scared that I will be a disappointment - both to myself and everyone else.
What is your favorite memory?	My favorite memories haven't been formed yet.
When was the last time God spoke to you and what did He say?	I talk to God all the time and I'm sure He's listening but I don't know if He's ever spoken back.
What is going to be your mark on this life?	My mark on this life is going to be that I had the power to change. Change myself, change my predicaments, changing fate and changing the world.
What advice would you give to your parents that will help them in raising you?	Back up. Space is key.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	It feels like pain.
Are you enough?	I am not enough. Because I am not trying as hard as I can to be the best person that I can be.

Paul

Age	17
Who Are You?	I am just a 17-year-old boy with dreams and aspirations of becoming a doctor/surgeon. I am introverted and extroverted depending on the people I am around. When I am around older people, I am more shy and reserved. And when I'm around my peers, I am more outgoing. I think of myself as kind and extremely generous. But I feel that my kindness and generosity rarely pays off.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I fall into nobody's arms. If I fall, no one is there to catch me. Therefore I have to depend on myself and fend for myself. I have friends in real life. But I can never truly rely on them because there is always a possibility of betrayal. In the end, the only person I can depend on is me.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	To get into Harvard Medical School. It is my one true miracle because once I get into Harvard, I'll be on cloud nine. By graduating from such a good college, I can get any job I want, get any girl I want, and people will know that I exist.
What is your weapon?	My weapon is my intellect and my motivation. I am motivated in almost everything I do. And my motivation is my weapon because it is what pushes me forward to get the task done.
What is going to be your mark on this life?	I don't have a mark on this life. If I die, no one will know that I ever existed. I don't have a diary. I regret not having a diary because if something were to happen to me, people would forget me in a like few years after.
Are you enough?	No, I am not enough. My friends are all better than me in everything. They are better than me intellectually, physically, and socially. An example would be the following. My friends all have 110 averages in school, are physically buff, have girlfriends/boyfriends, and have many other friends. I, on the other hand, have a 90 average, am physically weak, have very few friends, and can’t get a girlfriend. My friends are better than me in comparison and they make me feel like I am not enough. I have always pushed myself over the top and it pains me to know that no matter how hard I try, there will always be people better than me. Someday, when I am at the top, I will be enough and I will be satisfied. And I will keep pushing myself until that day.

Gavin

Age	18
Who Are You?	I am someone brimming with love and have no one to share it with; someone who's constantly screaming "Look at me!" on the inside; someone with strong legs built up from years of running; running away from people who offered a helping hand and running away from once in a lifetime opportunity because of the fear of disappointment.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I haven't been lucky enough to find someone who has able arms.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	Peace in my life.
What is your weapon?	My smile. My painted smile is my one defense against the world.
Who do you miss the most?	My sister.
What are you scared of?	What's unfortunate about my fears is the fact that they are the very reason I'm trapped. I'm terrified of letting people into my life, because I've learned that's how you get hurt. So many times I've tried to rationalize with myself that what I'm most scared of will bring me the most happiness - if only I were willing to take a leap of faith.
Is there sometimes an emptiness inside you and what does it feel like?	Yes, constantly. I feel pangs of sadness because I feel like someone or something is missing. To this day, I have no idea who or what it is.

shorty

Age	16
Who Are You?	Who Are You?
Whose arms do you fall into?	I wish I had someone’s arms to fall into. Then maybe I would be different and not be that person that has to wear long sleeves just to avoid questions
What is your weapon?	I hate admitting it but cutting is my weapon. And honestly, I’m afraid of my weapon. I’m afraid that maybe one day I’ll make a mistake and not be able to take it back.

tenzin

Age	16
Who Are You?	I’m a student in 9th grade so far.
Whose arms do you fall into?	My girlfriend’s
Who do you miss the most?	I miss my first kiss
What are you scared of?	I’m scared of death

Jess Kogan

Age	16
Who Are You?	I am Me. Who is that exactly? I'm still trying to figure that out. I am closer to figuring out then I was a few years, months, even days ago, but I'm still trying to define who I am.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	Some one who can except me exactly the way I am.
What are you scared of?	Being alone. In death, in a room full of all of my "friends", anywhere

tall girl with a stone’s constitution

Age	17
Who Are You?	originally from the city, now a mid-western suburban girl, id like to call myself a singer but im not sure if that’s true, i guess i would say im a music enthusiast, i used to be a basketball player but figured out it wasn’t really me, a politician's daughter, sheltered - but im workin on that one
Whose arms do you fall into?	whichever girl (of the 5) is there to listen, music's arms - music always understands but doesn’t tell me its gonna be okay like the girls do
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	true love
What is your weapon?	my parents - they are my excuse for anything and everything i don’t want to do and everything i do want to do but am too scared
Who do you miss the most?	sammy don’t get me wrong my current best friends are amazing but feeling the distance between my best friend of last year breaks my heart and people grow apart and that’s fine and i don’t want to say i wish things would go back to the way they were cuz that’s not fair and that’s not realistic but i wish she would validate what she says with her actions, and i know im a year older and i’m going to college next year but IM STILL HERE. i dont like change, especially with my friends and its too soon. i wish she could find a way to let me know that i’m as important to her as she is to me. because i will always consider her my best friend
What are you scared of?	reality, the real world, failure, not getting married, being alone.
Are you enough?	i try to tell myself that i’m enough, but i just don’t believe it. i’ve never been depressed and i’m not suicidal - in fact im a very happy person and i have a very comfortable life and i’m very thankful for that and its nice but i get lonely very easily. i am not enough for myself and i don’t know why

The Number Six

Age	16
Who Are You?	I am a girl. A heart, a brain, a pair of lungs, the whole bit. I have feelings. I am a teenager. I am me.
Whose arms do you fall into?	The arms of my friends. In particular, the arms of my best friend. We'll call her The Number Seven. She'll listen to anything I say. Also, the arms of my band teacher. He's one of the easiest teachers to talk to and will also listen to anything I say.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	If there is one thing in this world that I hate... it's hate. A world without it would be the ultimate miracle. A world without hate.
What is your weapon?	My weapon is music. My french horn, my guitar, my flute. My voice (even if it is horrible, it's beautiful to me and me only.)
Who do you miss the most?	My Nana. A cancer survivor three times over who lost the battle in the end.
What are you scared of?	The future. Humans are naturally afraid of the unknown and my future is unknown to me and everyone else.
Are you enough?	I am enough!

SheSureCanShoot

Age	17
Who Are You?	I am a highschooler, who wants to never leave home. I am the red-headed cheerleader that speaks too loud. I am the smart girl that applies too little. I am the girl scoring points, but only on the field. I am a sister to none and a best friend to one. I am no longer a child, but I am still foolish. I am Me.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I fall into her arms. She has been my support system, my backbone, my refuge. She has watched me cry, cried with me, and just cried to me herself. She is my best friend, my amazing friend, most times my only friend. She's the person who I'll ask to hold hands with when we're walking in the mall. She's the one who tells me not to eat that 3984320 chocolate chip cookie. When I feel like I can no longer stand, I fall into my best friends arms.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	I am waiting to see the world in beauty. I am waiting to be apart of something wonderful. I am waiting to shed light onto another’s heart. I am waiting to fall in love.
What is your weapon?	I am witty. I can come back with a smart comment at any point in time. I need no time to think of something catchy to say. I'm am a quick thinker and most can not keep up with me. I am witty, and nothing can make a stand against good wit.
Who do you miss the most?	I miss not having my father to walk through life with me. I don't know if he would have been an involved parent, I don't know if he would have been a parent to me at all... but I miss having the opportunity there.
What are you scared of?	I am scared of almost anything. I avoid most things because I fear what may happen if they are faced head on. I let people win arguments they shouldn't because I'm afraid to lose a friendship. I cave under pressure because I am scared I won't live up to the expectation. I'm petrified of becoming someone I'll look back on in ten years and hate. I'm scared of my decisions and that I'm making the wrong ones. I'm scared of many things, many people, many situations. I'm scared that things will not turn out how they were promised to. I'm scared that I'll pour my heart into someone who won't return that love back. I'm scared of changing. I fear the future and I'm horrified at how fast time moves.
Are you enough?	Most days I seem to be enough. To others I am not fast enough, not smart enough, not happy enough. To some I am fabulous and responsible. I am proud, but work hard for what I have. To one, to me, I am sometimes enough, but only sometimes. I know I can be better. To be enough, and the days I am enough, are the days I set aside for bettering my outlooks, my goals, my contribution to my community. Sometimes I am not enough, but I plan on changing that, I plan on being more than enough, always.

Julia

Age	16
Who Are You?	An odd mix between an adult and child; driven by the thirst for independence and respect but still vulnerable and growing in just about every single way.
Whose arms do you fall into?	My best friend's. I feel guilty often because I feel like the weight of my world is too heavy for her to balance along with the weight of her own tumbling universe.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	To, one day, feel like every single incident of my entire life has served as a stepping stone to a road of self-accpetance.
What is your weapon?	Music. Smashing the keys of my piano repeatedly until a melody that expresses my inner-emotions flies out is something that has helped me neglect the stress in my life that would otherwise consume me completely and strain my creativity forever.
Who do you miss the most?	The person who I've gone nearly a year without seeing. The person who taught me the beauty of kindness by simply smiling every single morning. The person who had the ability to filter out appearances and popularity in order to see the truth in everyone. The person who I will never forget as they stay branded in my memory for as long as I live.
What are you scared of?	Crying and never stopping.
Are you enough?	No one is enough. To be enough is to live without doubt of being enough. But since life is, in itself, doubt and unpredictability, no one has the power to turn a corner and know exactly what challenges lie ahead; to know what new expectations they will need to reach.

(no name)

What is the one miracle you are waiting for?

I am waiting for a beautiful girl (inside and out) and an amazing relationship. I'm afraid I'm too shallow cause I've never been close to a girl. I think I make excuses of why not to seek a girl out, either because she's too good for me, too pretty, not Jewish, or I'll graduate and we'll never talk. And I'm very afraid that I'm superficial and I can't see the inner beauty in people, and Every girl i pass I'm missing a chance to make a really good friend. I'm waiting to be close to someone. The miracle I was waiting for happened this past weekend. It was very nice, but it wasn't real. I kissed a girl, but we both knew nothing would come of it. I'm still waiting for love; I'm waiting for that day when i can ask a girl out, invite her to prom, or tell her I love her.

perfectimperfection

Age	17
Who Are You?	I guess i thought i knew but the more i thought about it i realized that im not who i wanted to be so i dont know whats real. I am strong but i am vulnerable i am independent but i need i am a good kid but i break the rules i am creative but i dont stand out im lost on a one way street.
Whose arms do you fall into?	it was her but she changed it was him but then i wasnt enough anymore it was another him but he walked out on me now...im not sure
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	to stop being left behind.
What is your weapon?	darkness
Who do you miss the most?	Sometimes I wonder why we do it, run in circles looking for something that can’t be found. For, even when we catch what we think were looking for we always seems to lose grasp. As we slip we plunge into a pit of disbelief of how quickly the one thing we need is being deflected by the only thing we thought we had, leaving us stripped of our hopes, dreams and instead just a blank faint idea of who we used to be. As the time passes we realize whatever we had whether it be love or just a sense of temporary belonging it is inevitable that it shall fade… They say beautiful things can blossom out of tragedy but the scars never fade the soul never mends and eventually we will all perish in a whirl of fate controlled by the spirits that guide us To search for such meaning to the reasons for love will only leave you more lost than where you started for it is not meant to be found. I question if the love I felt was worth the pain embedded into me. I try to stay out of my head but it is throbbing for a release where only one person holds the key. There is nothing left in my heart the capacity once filled has been emptied by my tears. I want to feel whole again I want to have a purpose I want to be happy but without half my soul torn and broken by the former bonds of love I am left incomplete. take me back there bring me to the place I was where I was not alone and there were no such thing as goodbyes.
What are you scared of?	that im not good at anything

TE QUIERO

Age	16
Who Are You?	I don't know. I'm so lost trying to find myself, Just when I thought I did, it wasn't really me. I just don't anymore.
Whose arms do you fall into?	My cousin who is my best friend and who is always there for me. she understands me and is there for me when no one else is.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	To find the one guy to prove they're not all the same
What is your weapon?	My pride
Who do you miss the most?	Um, wow! I don't know if I miss anyone. Is it possible to miss someone who was never really there?
What are you scared of?	Being alone for the rest of my life
Are you enough?	I sometimes feel like I'm not. I feel that when I disappoint my parents. I live my life trying to please them and when I disappoint them I feel like I'm just not enough. But I can and will be something different. I will make something of my life. I'm just not gonna let my life pass me by.

Adina

Age	16
Who Are You?	i am everything that i do and work towards. i put myself into everything. i am also an exhausted soul with no strength left to continue working.
Whose arms do you fall into?	my teddy's
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	feeling whole again.
Who do you miss the most?	the person who turned out to be someone completely different from who i thought she was. i wish she would gain self-worth. i miss her beyond belief.
Are you enough?	i know in my soul i am, but it's so difficult to translate that into everyday life. there's more pressure, work, and difficulty than i can deal with. i am not enough to do everything and be everything in every aspect that i would like to be. i continually feel that i am not enough to combat everything that i am faced with.

Walking Contradiction

Age	16
Who Are You?	I am the shadow of my former self. I'm a ghost that never lived.
Whose arms do you fall into?	I'm still waiting to find out. I'm falling and waiting to be caught.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	Recognition.
What is your weapon?	I have none. I am fighting what's not there, striking at nothing.
Who do you miss the most?	How can you lose what you never had? How can you break what was never whole?
What are you scared of?	I'm afraid that all I am will disappear.
Are you enough?	When has enough ever been enough?

Jane

Age	16
Who Are You?	too short, too smart, not funny enough, not hot enough. i laugh at my own jokes, believe in love at first sight and think that clouds are made of the spirits of people who've died. i'm scared that no one will ever be "that" one person who understands me for who i am and genuinely be in love with me. i give too many second chances to the people who hurt me and i can be the best friend you'd ever have. i bake to clear my mind but in the process, end up eating tons of the cookie dough. i feel guilty after i eat anything unhealthy and i can't keep a diet. i get jealous when my big sister weighs less than me even though i know being over 100 pounds doesn't mean i'm fat. my pseudo-boyfriend's ex-girlfriend is a friend of mine but she doesn't like me. when you looked into my eyes at your lecture, i felt like you could see who i was, and that you could tell i was scared. the thing is, i can't really tell what scares me.
What is the one miracle you are waiting for?	to fall in love. i think that'd be more of a miracle than any amount of success i could have.
What are you scared of?	i'm scared of my life running by too fast and me looking back and having regrets. i'm scared of my friends finding out i smoked pot once (i've only told 3 of the 8 girls i'm really close with), because i feel like i have too many faults already even though i'm a straight A, 4.0 average, liked-by-adults, too-nice, no-acne, no-braces, have nice clothes girl. i'm scared that no matter who i like, they won't like me back and if i ever have a boyfriend, that our relationship will be compared to my good friend's relationship with her boyfriend. she's actually in love with him i think and they share EVERYTHING and CAN'T get enough of each other. when her friends are pissing her off, she has him to talk to and i have no one. i'm scared of getting old. my chem teacher is in her fifties, kinda fat and single and i'm scared as hell that one day i'll end up like her, sitting at home every night alone, playing online solitaire instead of grading tests. i've had people tell me i don't laugh or know how to have fun. this scares me because i can't tell if it's true.